Just listen

So I am not working this week...not by choice, but because the club didn't need me this week. Not working is driving me crazy and it's only been two days. I like to work, although it might annoy me, it keeps me busy and I actually like what I do. Like I've said millions of times before, the pool is the best job ever, but working inside is totally different. I know all the moms and all the kids because they're the only ones who really use the pool. When I'm inside, all the other girls know all the men because that's all they see. So I am completely confused by all the names and always have to ask who is who unless the wife is with the man. It's weird but oh well.

Today was a normal day. Wake up, breakfast, school and the gym. But I also got the pleasure of taking a catnap and then going to see a long time friend. I met Ashley at Harper & Madison, a cute little cafe with coffee, sandwiches and pastries. The coffee was really good and the place was really nice. Ash and I got to talk about a lot of things and I think it was good for both of us. Plus I just really miss talking to Ash on a regular basis. She's just a really special person to me. After talking for two straight hours, we went to the Brew Pub to meet up with our friend Thomas and Alfonso (he's from Chile) for Spanish group. We talked in English for a while and then we, and when I saw we I mean Ash, Thomas and Alfonso, started talking in Spanish. I just listened.

I have taken Spanish, continually, since freshman year of high school. I technically started in fourth grade at John Deimer Elementary but that was just basic Spanish like counting, colors and weather. I wanted to speak Spanish because of the sound of the language and everyone who spoke it spoke so fast! I wanted that ability. I first tried speaking in English really fast to see if I could even attempt speaking in another language fast. I eventually mastered speaking...well? I think in Spain and a few weeks after I was doing pretty good, but the lack of use and lack of people to speak with really took a toll on my ability to speak off hand. I love Spanish and I don't really know why but it just fascinates me. I love speaking, reading, listening and writing Spanish. My Spanish skills have been alack for a long time and going to Spanish group tonight with Ash really made me feel stupid for not keeping up with my skills. Hopefully getting into the swing of things with going to Spanish group will help me get back to where I was. One thing that I didn't lose throughout the year my ability to listen and understand Spanish. So tonight I just listened, which was really nice. I love just hearing the language, even if it's broken down for teaching purposes.

So I sit here, pondering my pathetic Spanish skills, trying to think of ways to enhance them. Watching Gilmore Girls in the background and laying on my cars pillows, missing someone I see every day. Not only do I need to practice Spanish, I also need to get into a regular routine of writing on here. It's still kind of new, so it's easy to forget about it. Maybe I need a daily reminder.  I don't know. Either way, that's all for now. TTFN...ta ta for now :)

Summer hath gone away

Where in the world did summer go?

Those hot, sizzily days...I live for those. Summer is my season. Lots of sunshine, lots of green, relaxation...well when I was little. Now I have to work, but thankfully I work outside at a pool so I get all that sunshine. Since I started at the pool, I can't work inside when it's nice out. I can't. The sunshine calls out to me and it makes me happy. I love rain, but I love sunshine more. Plus watching the clouds when it's slow at work is always entertaining.

Plus my job at the pool is the best freaking job in the world! I get to be outside, as aforementioned, I get to play with kids all day, I get to swim whenever I want to, I get a free tan and my boss is basically the most amazing boss ever (I sound like a valley girl with all the "freaking" and "ever"). It's a lot of work, although it doesn't seem like it. Keeping the pool within state regulations is probably the hardest part. The stupid chlorine levels and the flipping baby pool. I want to kill the baby pool. The best part, besides the sunshine, is my co-workers. We're all a little family and it makes me really happy. I will say that it's weird when new people come in to work because the family balance is off but this summer, our YCC pool family gained a few people and I think all of us were ok with it.

With summer on it's way out, fall comes in. The only good thing about fall is the colors. I love the reds, oranges and yellows. The browns can wait because that's all we see here in Montana. And since I am almost done with school, I'm slightly excited for school. I only have six classes left and then I'm DONE!!! So I got into three classes this fall and it makes me happy. I went into the advising office and basically told my adviser that I didn't care what classes I got into, that I just needed to get into two or three classes. Mission accomplished. Thank goodness. Now just to get into the swing of things...

And in the beginning...

I have seen a lot of my friends and some of my family get into the blogging craze. I love reading everyone's, but I never thought it would be something I would be into. I remember I had to do a blog for Spain when I studied abroad and I hated it. I think I had to do it once a week and I think I ended up doing it maybe once every two weeks...whoops. Maybe it was because I had to do it, and now I don't. It's a choice. So we'll see how well this actually goes.

So my life has been a little crazy for the last year or so. I have been sick since last July and I still don't have the exact answer as to what I have or don't have. I guess it has been kind of getting better but as usual, some days are better than others. It's a lot of trial and error. As for everything else, it's just been one stressful thing after another. Am I going back to Missoula? Or am I staying in Billings? Where am I going to live? Work? And how in the world is school going to go this year? I have had so many problems with the schools I have been attending that it gets to the point of frustration that I just want to throw my hands in the air and give up. It's a week before school and I have yet to get the answers I need.

I moved away from Billings last year and at the time it was so refreshing. Missoula was a nice change, it was new and exciting. Everything seemed so cool and not Billings. The University was really cool and even now I wish it was here in Billings. In the beginning, other than being dead sick, everything was awesome. I met cool people and we did cool things. It was great. Slowly the glow wore off and it wasn't as great as I thought it was. I had no car or job when I moved up there. Missoula is the worst place to try to find a job, trust me, it took me four months to find a job. Not a fun situation. Once I got a job, it was a little better. But by the time the second semester came, I was sicker than in the beginning which was making life a lot harder. I kept to myself because I couldn't or didn't want to do what everyone else was doing...which involved a lot of drinking. I don't ever do this, but I called my mom crying because I was so lonely. Eventually, I began to loathe Missoula and I still do in a way. I still think it's a great town to visit or live in, but it's just not my cup of tea. So I am back in Billings and happy to be here.

So this is where I am. Still in limbo with school, a place to live and where my life is leading, but still trying to make sense of it all. Hopefully answers will come and so will peace.