Sunday, October 23, 2011

Burning a hole...

I was on my way home from hanging out with Ashley at OTL (which was awesome. I love hanging out with her) and was craving pizza. Not something I normally crave or really should crave since it usually comes with tomato sauce (this odd comment will be explained later). It was a passing craving, so I was planning on forgetting it. But then when I pulled up at home, a Domino's delivery guy drove past me. I thought, "That's it! I am having pizza! It's a sign!" I walk inside, looking up the pizza number because I knew if I ordered one, Daniel would help me eat it. Then I come to find that my mom had made mashed potatoes, green beans, turkey, cranberry sauce and had a bottle of wine. I was so excited. Not only did I save money by not ordering a pizza, but I was also craving a meal exactly like this. So we pray and plate up. I pour myself a glass of wine and sit down to watch the fourth game of the World Series. Halfway through my dinner, my stomach starts to hurt. I thought it was just hurting because I was still slightly hungry and it would go away by the time I was done. Was I right? No. Definitely no. My stomach was burning as I finished my dinner. I was in so much pain that my mom had to get my purse so I could immediately inhale some tums. Eventually I had to lie down because it hurt so bad. An amazing dinner turned to crap.

Why, you ask? That's a good question. What the heck was making my stomach burn with such a vengeance? Oh wait, I have an ulcer (possibly) the size of a quarter sitting in the left side of my stomach. I had three sips of wine during this amazing dinner. THREE SIPS!! And that is what destroyed such a pleasant moment. Stupid thing. I found out I had an ulcer this summer, but apparently I have had it since last year. I couldn't eat a lot or anything without feeling sick. I went out with everyone and had two drinks (I know some people will say, "Two drinks? Yeah right." No, seriously, I had two drinks) only to feel like I drank the entire bar to myself. I would be so hungover (after two drinks!!) and throwing up pure acid. It was not fun. I spent months with a burning sensation in my stomach and chest without having a clue what was going on. So many late night runs to the Curry Health Center with Kim and so many times being sent home with a "Just lie down with this heating pad." Or "It just seems like you're having problems digesting." And the infamous, "Call if you need anything!" Very helpful, right? Nahhhhhh. Eventually it got to the point where I was drenched in sweat, hyperventilating and writhing in pain without an idea of why.

This started a series of blood tests, doctor visits, lots of sleep and pill taking. So many ideas were thrown around, but did any have merit? Maybe. Probably. But all in all, they still had no clue what was going on...for sure. I had no solid answers. I was scared of needles before this last year. Now, I'm good. I just have to close my eyes. No throwing up or passing out. I had so many frustrating appointments and a lot of scary things presented to me. The doctor thought I has Hepatitis (inflammation of the liver) but that was a no go...all four types. People said I was drinking too much...really? I didn't even drink that much when I could actually drink. They said my gall bladder was inflamed and was producing too much bile which was being pushed back into my stomach causing the acid reflux. I had blood tests and an ultrasound for that. They also considered surgery. After three or four months of doctor's appointments every week, my doctor was determined without a doubt that I had Hepatitis and it just wasn't showing up in the blood tests.

I came home for the summer and saw a doctor here who immediately diagnosed me with an ulcer. Reason (or reasons I guess)? Too much ibuprofen over the years. I started taking it every day because of headaches. I was told to stop taking it. The other reason? Wayyyyy too much stress! I was instructed not to be so stressed out. Don't eat tomatoes, oranges, lemons, onions, chocolate, mint, caffeine or anything spicy. And I was to take Priolsec every day again (I had been taking it for four months straight). And more blood tests. My liver, sugar, thyroid and kidneys were all good. What the heck! Three months later, with multiple good days and several acid "attacks," I went back to the doctor. I still felt overall the same. More blood tests and another ultrasound.Yay! Not. Oh and everything that was good....was high again. Stupid body. Since then, back in August, I have not been to or near a doctor.

Do I have the ultimate answer for what's wrong? No. All I know is that I have an ulcer and it hurts when it's irritated. Are there more tests to be run? Yes. Am I gluten intolerant? Diabetic? Do I have Mono? Before this whole thing, I was a healthy person. I rarely got sick. If I did, it was a cold. Now, I have one wrong thing to eat, I am down for the count. This past year, three cases of walking pneumonia, an off liver, inflamed gall bladder and an ulcerI. AM. OVER. IT!!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

La la la


I am really not good at this writing every day or every other day kind of thing. Maybe it’s because I feel like I don’t have much to say. Plus since the club is not really scheduling me because there’s nothing going on, my day consists of waking up, school, the gym and then going home. And if I’m really bored, I go back to the gym. I have been applying all over the place, but sadly I might have to look outside of the restaurant business. Other than the pool, which keeps me constantly moving, I haven’t worked outside of the food industry. I don’t know how I would feel about working in a clothing store or a bank or a place that isn’t a restaurant. It’s just frustrating.

I have stared at that last paragraph for almost five minutes…I just don’t have anything to say. I like to write and I like to put my thoughts down but I am unable to put my thoughts into words for this blog. It’s odd. I am however watching Big Bang Theory right now, which probably isn’t helping my lack of thought. I really like this show but I don’t like how everything is more and more about sex. It’s always a prevalent theme in the show but in the fourth season literally every episode is about sex. And ever present theme in almost every show on TV now.

You know what I find oddly satisfying? Doing my laundry. I hate doing it initially but once everything is done and I’ve actually hung everything up, I really like it. But then, once that’s done, it usually makes me want to clean my room, organize the bathroom and everything else. It’s a vicious circle of housework. I think I need to apply that to my almost non-existent homework load. I am such a horrible procrastinator. But somehow I feel like I do better when I wait to do my papers and such. That could just be a huge sigh of relief in having it all done and over with. Bahhhh…I’m over school. Just one more semester and I am done!! WHOOO!!! Speaking of homework I should probably go do it…boo.